Why I am unable to stop this cycling and get of this low mood roller-coaster!
I feel like I am stuck in my life, like things aren’t progressing. I want and need to make some changes- I have been feeling like this for a while and it’s a feeling that I want to go away but no matter what I do, no matter how productive I am this feeling is still there are won’t go away. I think because there is so much waiting and uncertainly in our lives currently that its adding to this transition feeling. We are waiting to move into an adapted house, I am at the end of my digital mums course and my health is every much up in the air.
So I thought I would share with you some of the things I have been doing to get out of this feeling of not being in control or knowing how things are going to be. It’s a complete lack of stability. And hopefully if you are feeling similar or know someone that is this post can help in some way.
Acknowledge your feelingsI think its really important that you acknowledge whats going on and how your feeling. Its really the first step into start making a difference to your life. You can do this my simply speaking out loud in front of a mirror or saying it in your head- which ever works for you!
To start a new hobbyYouTube, editing and filming used to be my hobby but it has turned into my job and now I have zero hobbies. This is just because of my hobby turning into my job though- it's also down to being a mum and losing my identity a little bit as well. So I firmly believe that finding a hobby is key to getting out of a rut. It could be a 10 week evening class at your local college, joining a craft group and like me joining the Military Wives Choir.
Say YES more
I am a BIG no person. I think this has a lot to do with my disability I hate leaving the house as it means getting help with getting dressed etc plus then I need someone to come with me and then it usually wares me out for the rest of the day. So sometimes its just easier to say no but it's at a cost to my mental health and that's not a healthy way to live!
Make new friends
As an adult making friends is HARD! For me especially we move a lot so I have to pack up and pick up constantly. Now my children are in school and I work from home I don't have those normal avenues for meeting other mums or other people. There are apps like MUSH and a website call MEET UPs where you can meet like minded people.
Changing you spaceThis could be anything from reorganising a room in your home, organising all those jobs you don't want to do or have been putting off and it could be just taking 30 minutes a day to take a walk or get outside. Changing your scenery can have a real impact on your mood for the day.
Take a digital break
I spend 90 percent of my time with my nose to my laptop. With finishing my course and starting my freelance career I am working all hours to get it off the ground. But it's not healthy and can lead to a spiral of low and out of control emotions. A digital break doesn't just mean off social media but also TV, games consoles as well. The idea to to read, listen to a podcast, bake and mindful colouring.
Talk to people about it
There is NO POINT keeping your feelings to yourself. That's not helping you or allowing anyone to help you. Talk to people let them know how you are feeling so they can support you. You never know they might actually say 'yes I could see a change' or something to that effect and they may have not known what to do do you. Speak to you friends, family and if you think you need to your GP.
Look into therapy
So as before if you think you may need therapy there are lots of different types. Speak to your GP about steps to well-being if you are in the UK or if you think you need some form of therapy but not as intense potentially look at life coaching or a private therapist that can tailor it to your needs.
Be more creative
You might think that you aren't really a creative kind of person or it may not be your thing. But art therapy is a clinically proven technique used by health professionals to treat mental health conditions. There are lots of mindful colouring books for example, or you could, start scrap booking, baking or there is a book called the 'artists way' that kind of takes you through the steps to opening up your creative side.
Move your body
This can be really hard for someone like me or if exercise is just not your thing. But its really important to move as we all know about the health benefits. Maybe start slowly with following a bit of yoga from a YouTube video and work up to taking part in some classes. Or you could change your scenery and go for a short walk each day.
Listen to motivational podcasts
I LOVE LOVE LOVE these. For be the best time to listen to a Tedtalk or something similar is in the morning where I am my most productive. Whatever works for you with your routine give these a try and get motivation!
Have something to look forward to Having something to look forward to is really important. It gives you a chance to feel excited and happy about an up coming event. It allows you to feel happy and get out of the rut kind of feelings.
Treat yourself
Now I am not talking about going on a spending slurge or do anything reckless. But allow yourself that piece of cake and a coffee, or if you want to and can maybe go on a mini break somewhere. My husband am I are planning our at home spa night on a Friday night from next week and that's giving me something to look forward to. It's also some excellent digital free time!
Again these are just some of my ideas of how I am getting myself out of my current rut and improve my mood. I am not a professional my any means but I hope these can provide you with some information if you are like me and feeling the same! Let me know how you get on and if you have any other ideas that could help!
By Sophie McLaren